What is the dumbest thing you can do when you have four slipped discs?
Oh, I don’t know, maybe haul around heavy boxes of books, and then drag heavy bookcases through the basement by yourself?
I could have waited until my dad got here with the truck, but no, I had to be a big badass and have the bookcases all ready to rock and roll at the foot of the stairs when he arrived to take them to the new house.
At least I didn’t haul them up the stairs by myself.
I considered it, though.
Because I am a dumbass.
Now half the bookcases and J.’s new twin bed are at the new house, along with what we have been hauling there every week in my mom’s car.
Melinda told me yesterday that this is the slowest move in history, and yes, it is. We’re moving, one fucking lamp at a time.
It’s maddening, but we’re getting the job done.
There are a lot of repairs that still have to be done. For instance, whoever wired the Trance House was most definitely on the crack. Half of the outlets don’t work. You can’t use the microwave when the coffee pot is on, and you can’t use the hair dryer when any other electrical appliance is running.
It’s so charming.
We also still have to paint the kitchen, the J-Man’s room, and the back hallway. I am looking forward to painting the kitchen about as much as I looked forward to my stepbrother sitting on my head and farting. I HATE painting cabinets. What a pain in the ass.
This also means that we are going to have to paint over my painstakingly applied, hand-painted border, done free-hand. It features little red flowers on green vines and is super cute, and I hate to paint over it.
(Here is where I would insert a photo, if I could find the wire to my damned camera.)
Anyway, there’s a lot going on. The J-Man’s new school wants exhaustive proof of residency, which I obviously do not have yet, and this is going to make registering him a little difficult. They also want mortage statements and utility bills, which are all still going to be in my stepdad’s name, so I’m wondering if they are still going to think we’re the sort of people who are just trying to finagle our kid into a better school district by lying.
I’m not sure what to do about this.
In other news, our elderly neighbors moved yesterday. These are the folks that used to take me to the doctor frequently, and were people I spent a whole lot of time with. They had dinners with us, I went over there for morning coffee a lot to chat, and they were very like a third set of grandparents for me.
Diana, who is eighty, still mows her own lawn and works on her own house, and did most of the packing and moving with help from her kids. She’s a powerhouse much in the same vein as my mother – the type that never slows down, the woman that can do anything and everything.
The J-Man used to call her after I’d had seizures, before he was old enough to deal with them on his own, and I would wake up to her soothing voice and a cold cloth on my forehead. It was a nice way to wake up.
John is a few years older and is struggling with prostate cancer. He loves to tell stories about his many interesting jobs, among them a schoolteacher, a fighter pilot in the Air Force, and a cop.
Yesterday I stopped in to say goodbye and John was having a rough day, so much so that he barely spoke. He looked puffy and pale, and sat in the kitchen with a blanket over his lap. I am worried for him, but at the same time I’m glad they’re moving to a quiet retirement community out of the neighborhood which has seen so many bad changes over their lifetime.
I’m going to miss them so.
Happy Wednesday.

Re: slipped discs – I am woman, hear me roar … then crawl slowly to the vicodin bottle where I dry swallow two pills before collapsing on the heating pad for the next eight hours. Oh yeah. Been there and done that more times than I like to say.
I feel your pain RE: shitty wiring. I’ll never forget the time we had friends over to play poker, and lunging over the table in the kitchen to pull the cord on the overhead light when someone went to mircowave popcorn. I am not looking forward to summer, when it’s beastly hot and I have to turn off all the fans, tv, a/c, computer, and anything else that’s on just to defrost pork chops. Three rooms are on one breaker, and the fridge isn’t separate. Huzzah for our 100+ year old house!
Lori, I am right there. Right. There.
Ter, GAH. Our breakers are the same. I would like to find the crack addict that wired this house and shake him.
I feel your pain RE: shitty wiring. I’ll never forget the time we had friends over to play poker, and lunging over the table in the kitchen to pull the cord on the overhead light when someone went to mircowave popcorn. I am not looking forward to summer, when it’s beastly hot and I have to turn off all the fans, tv, a/c, computer, and anything else that’s on just to defrost pork chops. Three rooms are on one breaker, and the fridge isn’t separate. Huzzah for our 100+ year old house!
+1
Ok so I live in a house that was built 80+ years ago and we were having some small *ahem* electrical fires. We finally got an electrician out here and the only thing that really needed to be done was tightening the screws on the box.
Its sooo crazy! I mean the sockets don’t even spark anymore.
LOL, Nightowl! Did he charge you a hundred bucks for that??
Renters won’t have mortgage statements, so there must be a way for school districts to accept something other than mortgage statements as proof of residency.
Heya baby girl! I totally understand the electrical bullshit. I lived in a 100+ year old territorial adobe house in Tucson with a 30 amp breaker. One outlet per room. I too had to decide which appliance I would be able to run at any given time and it sucked big time. As for the J-Man’s school, all you need is to have your step-dad write a letter to the school letting them know that you have been staying at his house for the last few months and that this is your permanent address. That should suffice legally.
And stop trying to be Wonder woman with the move you silly schmuck. You can’t fuck around where your back is concerned. My messed up discs are to the point now where I can’t feel the sides of my legs and my feet feel like they are on hot coals all the time. There are too many days where I wish I could chop off my legs because it gets so bad. Don’t push it sweetie – not worth the possible outcome.
Be good to yourself or I may have to crawl back there and spank you.
Yeah, you know I do love ya. (hug)
– John in Phoenix
This may be a few days and dollars short, but I live with my folks, too, and when my kiddo (9th grader) had to be registered in the local schools, I had to show proof of THEIR residency, then we all had to sign a form that stated I lived with them. We had to have it notarized and all that happy crappy, and yes it was a pain in the arse, but it was definitely do-able.