August 23rd, 2009 | Author: trancejen
My cats have fleas. Now can you possibly tell me how in the hell my strictly-INSIDE cats could get fleas??
I blame the kid from down the street, henceforth to be referred to as “Pigpen”. Pigpen has several outside cats, and I swear to God the little shit brought fleas inside my house and transferred them via his cloud of filth.
The child smells, people. He smells BAD. He smells worse than Shaq’s dirty sweatsocks being steeped in warm urine.
He recently broke a wall in my hallway, if you can believe that. Apparently he leaned into it with his ridiculously chubby self and caused a three-foot crack.
I remain irritated by him, sometimes unreasonably so. The very sound of his voice irritates me beyond measure, but the J-Man really likes him so all I can do is grit my teeth and hold my breath when he walks by.
I am COVERED in flea bites. I seriously look as if I have the smallpox, and so does the J-Man. My mother is completely bite-free, probably due to her sour, cold blood.
I kid.
Anyway, we Frontlined the cats, sprayed the hell out of the entire house with flea spray, and washed the bedding and rugs in hot water. If all of that doesn’t work I’m simply going to burn the house down.
In other annoying news, the doctor has informed the J-Man that he needs to lose twenty pounds.
I knew this. I’ve known this. I’ve been buying fruit in bulk so that he has healthy snacks and I’ve been monitoring his diet, but the fact remains that the child is a couch potato, or more accurately an X-Box/computer potato.
So, we’re exercising. I make him walk on the treadmill for a half an hour every night, and hopefully this will yield great results and also create healthy habits.
I lost fifteen pounds during the month of August and am trying to keep on trucking, so it’s sort of nice that we can do this together.
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I had to reschedule my mammogram because I originally showed up at the wrong facility, so boob-squishing is coming up next week. I also have to go to the crotch doctor for a repeat Pap smear because the first one apparently didn’t take.
Thanks a lot, doctor, because I am truly looking forward to repeating that fun-filled and joyous experience. Bring me your cold steel speculum, bring me your K-Y jelly, because I am PUMPED.
Right.
All in all, it’s been a bit of an annoying weekend with all the de-fleaing and Pigpen visits and to top it all off, a visit to the Mart of Wal.
I actually went for an eye appointment, because Wal-Mart’s vision center = CHEAP, but I also had to buy some school clothes for my niece and, embarrassingly enough, a girdle.
Yes, a girdle.
Truly I am either fifty years old or living in the fifties, I’m not sure which.
I need this “shapewear” (nice little euphemism for girdle) because my stomach, ravaged by both a vertical c-section and years of yo-yo dieting, looks rather like a flabby ass.
I know, pleasant imagery abounds on this website.
Anyway, I bought one and squashed myself into it, and damn, I’m looking pretty fine. It’s artifice, but it’s really slimming artifice.
So that’s been my week. Twenty-odd loads of laundry, kicking my kid’s ass to get him in shape, Pigpen, and girdle shopping at Wal-Mart.
Next week can only get better.
Happy Sunday, all. I wish a very happy birthday to my buddy Kevin, who rules.
For pc usage control I *strongly* reccommend PC Lockup from Aquariussoft (http://www.aquariussoft.com/pc-lock-up/). You can set usage limits by login and once the limit is reached, it logs them out. This has prevented me from throwing either my pc or my son out the window. There are no more arguments about pc time, he gets 1 1/2 hours a day during the school week in 1/2 hour chunks, with a minimum 1/2 hour between each logon. For xbox usage…you’re on your own
I had to get some “shapewear” myself, recently…my first since my wedding (24 years ago), I think. They make that stuff a lot more comfortable than they used to, thank goodness.
I also had the same problem with neighborhood “friends” who did not take proper care of their pets. We stopped associating with them, and the fleas and worms cleared right up. gross.
you might want to check out kate harding’s shapely prose, and health at every size. They are fat acceptance site with lots of good links about how being overweight might be socially unacceptable but it is not necessarily bad for your health. I would read the comment policy before commenting though. I hope I don’t offend you with my unasked for advice. I have been reading your blog for a long time and I struggled with my own eating disorder. I am normal weight but these two concepts changed my life.
Speaking as someone who has had as many as 10 cats but is now down to (ha!) only 7, I recommend the Adams Flea & Tick spray. It comes in a blue bottle, it’s like $12, it works like magic. Also, one of the most important things you can do to get rid of the fleas is to vacuum EVERYTHING – floors, furniture, all of it – EVERY SINGLE DAY and then empty the vacuum immediately. Do not let those vacuum-leavings sit in there, because then you will have fleas nesting in your vacuum cleaner.
For the itching, I recommend roll-on deoderant. We had fleas REALLY BAD once. Our cat didn’t go outside either. But that helped. Good luck.
Not to constantly suggest it, but your’ boy may benefit from martial arts. It did a world of good for my confidence, and it is a good aerobic time.
I had a propensity for apologizing for things I either could not control or had no reason to (things I had put effort into but had yet to perfect). Any time my Sensei thought I had apologized for no reason, he made me do 20 of something. Got me in shape fast and it reduced my lack of confidence. It is a mild form of aversion therapy, but it gets your’ kid in shape and it WILL build his confidence.
Not sure how I missed this, but thanks!